Sunday, 8 December 2013

The End Of 2013 In A Nutshell


2013 has been one hell of a year and not exactly in a good way. Lots has happened and nothing has changed. Makes sense - not really. The year has gone by in a flash, so many things I have not even blogged about. I am planning to do a month by month of the past year, starting with December 2012. I need 12 days to do it in, a day for each month. Time is not the problem it is more a matter of what kind of head space I am in and lately that place has been bad - real bad.

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The big events/things that have happened in 2013, is that I gave up smoking. It was 7 months last week and I never did my usual anniversary post about giving up. Not that I forgot because I was so over the addiction - in fact that was the very day that I was so close to lighting up. I have had a few days of being so close to grabbing a smoke out of someone's hand and just taking a long hard pull on it. I just forgot the date and my head was is in such a bad space, the thought of posting a 7 month anniversary post just never entered my mind.

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It has been a very busy year business wise, but also a hell of a year. When I think back to some of the things that happened this year, it seems like a lifetime ago, even a few years ago, but mostly the year has flown by. Next year we will be going through quite a change business wise, whether it is for the better or not, only time will tell.  I can't wait to see the back of 2013, but I am not holding out in the hope that 2014 will be any better. After all it will be the 7th year anniversary of Clint's death. It is so hard to believe and the pain is still as strong today as what it was on the 16th of March 2007, if not stronger. For me Clinty's death date will always be the 15th March 2007 . The 16th is just a technicality, because the clock had moved 3 hours into a new day, but it did not bring any happiness or sunshine to our lives that day. This is where Clinty's life ended. I don't think I have ever posted photos of the accident scene until now. The blue bakkie (pick up truck) is the vehicle that hit Clint, Clint is lying where the bottom tow truck is and where the people are standing in a circle - standing around him. His bike was behind the white car. That is how hard and far Clint was flung.

Accident Scene 15 March 2007
No!! 2014 will never bring happiness, it just can't, I have too much pain in my heart to ever be happy again. I do however, have to make a commitment to be happy for Chad's sake. This has been a huge year for Chad. He has grown up so much this year, he has changed so much, but I will leave all that for my next post. Unfortunately with all these changes going on with Chad, our relationship is taking strain. We are fighting so much. Chad is finding himself, but it is coming with a disrespectful arrogance and I am trying to teach him that confidence is great and a wonderful character trait, not arrogance. There is a huge difference between the two. He doesn't get it and it is definitely coming from the people he is hanging around with. I know it is wrong to compare, but I cannot help it - one thing Clint was not -  and that was arrogant and disrespectful. Hopefully it is just a stage Chad is going through. I still love you Chad - I love you very much and am so proud of you.
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I have been toying with the idea of having a Brazilian Blow Wave for some time now, but have only read bad reviews about it. Well that was a while back, but lately I have been hearing more and more about it and seeing more and more women who have had it done and who are extremely happy with it. I finally took the plunge and had it done. It meant changing hair salons as the salon that I go to does not do them. That is where I also heard the negative aspects of them. So they bad for you, so is smoking; drinking; bad fats; sweets; carbs and and and..... the list goes on, but it does not stop us from eating; drinking smoking and and and. I went ahead and had it done with an open mind and totally positive. Is it overrated, I am not sure. I had the Brasil Cacau Keratin Treatment. I had it done on Wednesday, 4 Dec 2013. For more info about it click here. The smell is absolutely horrendous. It burns your eyes; your throat; your lungs. I didn't think it would, because it is formaldehyde free. It took about 2 hours to do my hair, which included a cut. I don't have patience when it comes to sitting for hours having my hair/nails/face/teeth/feet done. I get bored and irritated, but this time, I didn't really, the time went by quickly, and I think I was too tense, expecting my hair to come out in chunks. I have read THAT many bad reviews about it - not any about your hair falling out in chunks, but I do have an overactive imagination. My hair felt amazing after I left the salon, but doesn't it always after it has been pampered and treated. Whilst trying to justify the costs against the feel of my hair, I was kind of leaning towards the "it's overrated" side. I couldn't validate the fact that some people earn less than what I was spending on my hair. I eased my conscience by thinking it is once in a blue moon. I still don't get how some women boast about the amount of money they spend on their hair every month/week, yet pay the person who cleans up after them the bare minimum wages or below minimum and then they still look average or below average. Well lets not judge. Mark thought it was a waste of money - he would - we won't even go there, other than I am not liking him very much at the moment. Needless to say I felt very deflated after spending so much money and time on my hair and not being able to justify the expense. Thursday morning was the big test. We woke up to no power and no power means I cannot blow dry my hair and flat iron it, so it dries all wavy and messy and all over the place. Well the Brasil Cacau Keratin Treatment is definitely worth the money and is not overrated. I combed my hair and kind of air dried it with my fingers, arrived at work, by then it was dry and just put my straightener through once and not even all over. Today I just washed it, combed it and let it dry - no flat iron. It is soft with a slight wave/kink in it. My hair never feels soft when I let it air dry. I will most definitely have it done again. The only snag is that you have to use Sulphate Free Shampoo and the treatment is not guaranteed if you do not use the Brasil Cacau products. It does not last in sea water, because of the salt, but I guess having it last for only a few weeks to have a hair hassle free holiday would be so worth it. I needed it when we went to Mozambique last December. With no electricity and the heat and humidity, everyday was not just a bad hair day, but an absolutely awful hair day, every day.

Brasil Cacau Anti-Frizz Shampoo & Conditioner

Another huge event in our lives, not so much an event, but a stroke of bad luck. We had one massive hailstorm last week on Thursday - 28 November 2013. The hail was like golf balls, in some areas as big as tennis balls. Whenever we think it is going to hail, we rush around moving cars around, this time we didn't - partly because it is always a waste if time and partly because of the building taking place, there is hardly any cover. My car is so badly hail damaged, Mark's bakkie is, customer's cars are damaged. I have never seen such huge hailstones in my life and it came down so suddenly. My office was flooded, the flat upstairs was almost knee deep in water - thanks to the builders - the reason for the changes coming in 2014.

Hail Stone

It stopped as suddenly as it started. We arrived home to find our pool looking like a dam and our fish pond looking like a mud bath. The pool still looks like a dam. Mark, who as I said earlier, I don't like at all right now, is so stubborn refuses to backwash the pool until the water clears, so he keeps buying different chemicals to try and clear the water. It doesn't work and hasn't worked 10 days later, but I just keep quiet. He hates the fact that I have been right about all of his bad business decisions, so all we do is fight about other stuff, because of the deep seated anger on my part and the embarrassment that he won't admit to, because everything I warned him about and tried to caution him about came true and he is not big enough or man enough to say sorry, you were right.
Pool Turned Pond

Back to the hail storm. The pond has cleared, except on Friday, a week later, Chad found one of our Koi dead. Now we only have two left. Other than the one who died on Friday and a couple of others that were washed out the pond when it had stormed, we have know idea what happened to all of them. We started off with 20, in 2007 when Clinty's memorial garden was finished. They dropped to 10 or 11 for years, then over night this year, they all disappeared and we only had 3 - now we have two big fat ones. We haven't bought more, because apparently if the new ones have diseases the others can die or vice versa.

Mud Bath

Pond
 What a year - and that is only the last quarter







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