Saturday, 31 May 2014

When A Random Stranger Says You Look Very Tired

I need my sleep, I love my sleep and I have to have my sleep. Don't mess with my sleep, because I get raging mad if you do. The only time my mind stops is when I am asleep and even then it doesn't really stop, because my dreams are just an extension of my thoughts. Mark snores so badly and we have huge fights about his snoring, because it wakes me up. I even tried sleeping in Clint's room for awhile, but it does not feel right as it is his room and his bed. I just sleep on top of his bedding and cover myself with my gown, so it is not like actually sleeping in his room. It does not make for a good nights sleep though. After Clint died, from when we left that disgusting institution that caused his death, I went straight to his room and slept in his bed in one of his hoodies. I slept in his room and hardly came out of it for two months, until Mark angrily told me that Clint would not like me smoking in his room and all I did was lie in the room and make it stink like smoke and Clint definitely would not approve. That jolted me a bit, because Clint hated me smoking and I was not allowed in his room if I had a smoke and besides the smoking, teenage boys don't like their moms in their rooms, so I stopped sleeping in his room. I cleaned it up and never slept there again.

To now go and sleep in his room would not be right, so Mark's snoring keeps me a wake at night. If I get woken up, I don't fall asleep again. I lie there for hours going over why I dreamt what I did dream or I remember something I was supposed to do that day or the day before and I worry about it and worry and think about other stuff and then fall into a deep sleep 15 minutes before my alarm does off. I am tired and exhausted and my eyes just want to close all the time. I haven't had a four to five hour afternoon nap deep sleep for ages and need it. I just need to have a long long uninterrupted sleep and have even thought about getting sleeping tablets, but I won't do that. I just want to pass out for hours.

Passed Out

This is how passed out I want to be, with not a care in the world. We won't even go into just how Miss Piggy snores, but hers is a kind of gentle soothing snore, unlike Mark's that just drives me in sane - I keep telling him it is beyond normal and beyond snoring. So yes I am tired, I am fall over my own two feet constantly tired. Yesterday I went to Hypermarket, I had to buy micro-fibre cloths among other things and as I stood looking at the cloths to see which would be best suited for drying cars properly, my trolley was in the way of a lady trying to pass. I apologized, moved my trolley and turned my attention back to the cloths that required a huge amount of concentration and intelligence - not really but that is how I felt. I heard a voice that sounded as if it was travelling through a long tunnel and did not pay much attention. It was only the lady passing and myself in the aisle - I thought she was on the phone. She said something else and in my daze and concentration on buying the right cloths I realized that she was speaking to me. I acknowledged her and she said "Shame you look so tired... are you very tired?" I said "No why?" I mean who wants to confide in a complete stranger whilst out shopping about how tired you are. She said "Your eyes are so red... you look so tired" I just smiled and said that I wasn't tired.

For the rest of my time shopping it bugged me that a complete stranger, who mind you, looked much older than me would notice how tired I looked. It bugged me so much wondering if my eyes were that red, that my eyes started burning and watering to the point that I thought I might have an eye infection - my eyes were not red before I left home. The power of the mind!!! I asked Mark if my eyes were red when I got back to work - they were not red to me, he said they were. I just felt more tired after a stranger pointed out that I looked tired and bought a Lucozade - the only energy drink I will ever drink and felt much better.

I planned on going on a Green Smoothie detox, but just don't have the energy. I know I am more than likely anaemic again, I haven't taken iron supplements for ages. Iron supplements aggravate GERD and Nexiam caused Iron Deficiency Anaemia. Can you ever win. For the past week, I have tried to not eat any GERD causing foods and have made myself a Green Smoothie every night before my dinner. It looks absolutely disgusting - Baby Spinach Smoothie - YUCK"!!!! I thought I would have to force it down, but it really looks worse than it tastes. The first night I put a bit too much Ginger in though, so it was very gingery, but OK. The only problem is that straight after drinking it, my throat starts closing. It is a weird feeling. It does not close as in I can't breathe, but I become very hoarse. I think it might be the ginger causing the GERD, so need to stop using ginger. The Spinach (which I hate unless it is cooked in fresh cream and butter - no goodness in that) has to be full of iron and other nutrients and although it has not made a difference in five days, I am hoping it will help with my lethargy eventually.

Green Smoothie

The Smoothie Ingredients
Half Cup Baby Spinach - From Woolworths
1 Carrot
1 Banana
I Apple
5 Raspberries or Seasonal Berry
Tiny Bit Of Grated Ginger
1 Glass Water
Half Teaspoon Cinnamon
 Blend all together and drink - makes two glasses

It really does not taste as bad as it looks and contains 5 portions of fruit and veg for the day. I am trying to convince Mark and Chad to also have a glass every night, but they are not keen. At least then I would not have to worry about us all having our five portions of fruit and veg everyday

Follow on Bloglovin

Thursday, 29 May 2014

Rambling Thoughts

This week life definitely got the better of creativity . It got the better of  most things and I feel like running far far away to a tiny Island with no human inhabitants - other than Mark and Chad that is. I haven't felt like blogging, this week. If only technology advanced to the point of hooking electrodes onto your temples, connecting it to a computer, pressing start and all thoughts transferred automatically to your blog or a platform of your choice. Then my blog would be as I want it, but that could be a problem too, because my thoughts unedited and uncensored could be a recipe for disaster, so it would have to have a "should you really say or think that" button. My head is so full of junk and thoughts and worries and ideas and I often wish I could take an erasing device and clear everything from my mind and start again. When I look at my animals I always wonder what goes through their minds as they lie there looking at you.

Deep In Thought ..... Or Not

The other day I was bitching about something and Chad and I got into a discussion about the appreciation of life and in one of my philosophical moments, I said there is always someone worse off than you, but also someone better off; there is also always someone kinder or less kind than you and we can apply it to everything in life, so we must not always accept the mediocre. We are entitled to strive and want more than what we have. We are entitled to be self centred and selfish at times, not to the point of hurting others, but to the point of self enrichment. To get through this Thursday and plough into the weekend I have found these quotes to ponder as I struggle with my own thoughts.

Have an awesome Thursday and even better weekend.

Sunday, 25 May 2014

Yesterday Today And Tomorrow

I am not in a very Sunshiny mood today. I am tired, my eyes are burning and I think I need to go back to bed. Mark and Chad have gone to Tarlton Raceway today and I think my plans are going to change to catching up on some sleep.

Garfield; Miss Piggy & Spike Trying To Find A Spot Of Autumn Sun 

Chad was meant to go to school yesterday for a compulsory workshop, but at the last minute they miraculously caught up their work and the workshop was cancelled.( Insert here - teacher decided going to school on a Winter Saturday morning was not a good idea). I am not complaining, because going to school from 9 to 2 on a Saturday is just cause for a disastrous week ahead. I have got to the stage that I am so over that school. If I think back I felt the same when Clint went there, except Clint loved the school and that was more to do with the kids that went there than anything else and when he died I just got so caught up in his happy memories and I forgot about all the negativity. Like the fact that he had to go to extra maths, because he did not understand maths when the school teachers taught him, but understood the extra maths teacher. It also had nothing to do with the amount of children in the class, because there were less children in his school class than there were in his extra maths class. It also had nothing to do with peer pressure or friend distraction, because his friends went to the same extra maths teacher .

The whole "tone" in the newsletters is just starting to irritate me to. I know that it is first and foremost a business; ethos and education trail very far below on the list, but the tone of "you need us more than we need you" is becoming more and more pronounced than previously and what they seem to forget is that there is a small private school on every second corner these days that may be less of a business and more of a source of good education than the next - or vice-versa. It is not like before when affordable education was only at overcrowded Public Schools not that their school fees are even that affordable anymore. I don't know why we sent Chad to the school, one of the reasons was because they never went on school camps, but now they do and the camps are compulsory. I have never believed in school camps, not even when I went to school. Clint didn't like them either and Chad is neither here nor there about them, but is not overly excited about camps. There are a lot of children that do not like going on camps so making it compulsory in my eyes is NOT nurturing or respecting each child's individuality. I won't be signing the indemnity form, because it is compulsory for the children to go, therefore I will not indemnify the school against anything that may happen whilst my child is on a compulsory outing.

Chad also has a teacher that really annoys me on a different level. She is always going on about him wearing his glasses. Chad has not worn glasses for years, he passed his eye test when he booked for his learners license, but this women has it in her head that he wore glasses last year. She had my email and phone number on speed dial until I realized that she is like a troll, if you keep feeding the troll, it will continue to come back for more. Now when she emails or sends text messages I just ignore them so she can go away. It is not the adult thing to do and it is not the thing to do with your child's education, but I am the type of person who thinks after they speak and I will end up telling her to worry about her daughter who also goes to the school and stands smoking on the pavement in full view of the parents waiting to fetch their children from school. It is against the school rules to smoke by the school - so worry about that first and I will worry about whether my child needs to wear glasses or not. I now know why Clint's friend and his parents had an issue at the school - they had the same troll that was behind their issues with the school and it is enough to want your child to just drop out of school.

Garfield  Hiding In The Chimney Of The Braai

On a more pleasant note, I took off my blurry rose tinted specs and opened my mind to what my eyes were seeing and noticed that Clint's garden was being over run by reeds (I think they are called reeds). Even the Strelitzia was being strangled and I asked Rabie to cut them back on Tuesday and I forgot all about it and on Friday he asked if I had seen what he had done and if it looks OK, I was rushing back to work and said I would check on Saturday.  The garden looks so much better. I need to buy seedlings to fill up the gaps and I might go today to buy them. The seeds I planted and mentioned in this post over here never grew - why am I not surprised. I should have given them to Rabie to plant. That guy drives me to total distraction, but he is really good at gardening. He is not just someone who works in a garden, because jobs are scarce and that is what unskilled people do in our country, he is a self taught gardener and he knows he is good at his job, which is why he buggers around and comes late and goes off on extended trips home and drives me batty. Now at least my Yesterday Today and Tomorrows can breathe and have a place in the garden. Clint's favourite plant when he was little.

Now for the rest of the day I may just be like Garfield and make myself small and unobtrusive and hide away from the world, but not under the chimney of the braai like she did, but in the warmth and comfort of my bed. I am guessing she went up there, because it is warm and sunny and the dog's can't steal or try and share her sun and bother her.

The plan was to bath the dogs -  yesterday would have been a better day, because it was warmer, but bathing dogs is kind of a Sunday thing. Then clean the budgie cages; maybe fix up my blog or sleep. Sleep tops them all. Today has been a real "give me the coffee and no one will get hurt" kinda day so I am buzzing on a coffee high and although my eyes pain they are so tired, I don't know why, because I never went to bed that late, after all the coffee I have had this morning I don't think I will fall asleep.

Have yourself a wonderful Sunday...

The Horrid Little Dog

Jingles is such a nervous shaky shivery dog. She is always shaking and shivering. When the temperatures dropped the other day, she shivered even more than normal, so I looked for a jersey to put on her. Our dogs think they are poodles and lapdogs, but lying on us or sitting on our laps is as far as the poodle in them goes. They don't wear jerseys. I always buy jerseys for them and they get pee'ed on or chewed up by each other or they drag behind them, so jerseys are now a thing of the past. I felt sorry for Jingles the other night, as she lay shivering next to me and I went to look for one of her jerseys. I found Pluto's World Cup T- Shirt that I bought for them during the 2010 World Cup Craze.

Jittery Jingles

She is such a horrid little dog, she attacks me and growls at me whilst I try and put the jersey on her. I have to cover her mouth with my gown so that she does not bite me and then slowly put the jersey on her. After the jersey is on she is happy and cuddles next to me. Just now I found her 2010 World Cup T-Shirt/Jersey and put it on her and she went crazy attacking me like a ferocious tiger - now she is cuddled next to me. She is the strangest dog. I read last year about a Jack Russell that bit off a child's ears. The dog always slept with the toddler and one morning just attacked the child. Jingles is crazy like that and can do some major damage. She has always been like that towards me and has bitten me a few times, when I bath her, cover her at night or pick her up, but she lies by me all the time. Weird little dog.

Calm Jingles

I have no idea why this dog is so Jittery, but as we all sit watching TV and drinking hot chocolate, she is now calm and fast asleep next to me. The ferocious tiger now tame.


Spike By His Daddy As Usual 

Snapwidget - Instagram Widget For Blogs

A picture is worth a thousand words ........... and Instagram is proof of that too. People who don't even speak the same language follow each other and like each other's photos, as the pictures tell a story all of their own. I only just recently started using Instagram (Um January - not so recent anymore) and love it. I have had a profile for awhile, but did not use it, until I stumbled on the Photo A Day Challenge created by Chantelle from the Fat Mum Slim Blog. I used to post the pictures on my blog, you can find them over here, but then it just became too time consuming and life got the better of creativity, so I stopped. I had the free  Snapwidget  widget on my blog anyway and just did not have the time to do both and was always playing catch up.You can get the free widget for your blog by clicking over here. "Snapwidget is an Instagram Widget that allows you to quickly and easily embed a Photo Gallery in your website or blog" Taken from Snapwidget Website. There is nothing wrong with the basic widget and it works fantastically. It has adverts, but not on the photo gallery on your blog, only when you click on the widget
When we went away for the weekend - post about that weekend to be posted one day soon or in the distant future, I just can't get my head around how badly the weekend turned out and why. Anyway, I left my USB connection at home and could not download my photos and until then I had only used my Instagram Account for my Photo A Day Challenge. I then put up pictures of the baboons at the resort and then wanted to change the widget and make it bigger, but I battled to log in.

I was being a huge techno-idiot and emailed Snapwidget's support team for help. Considering the time difference, I was amazed that they responded in two hours. I have never received a response from a support team so quickly - be it an app; a widget or a bank or any other support team. It turns out that I had forgotten that you don't log in with a username and password for the basic free widget, so I had not forgotten my username and password - I never had one in the first place - techno-idiot of note. You can even read in this post that I was such a techno-idiot when I started using Instagram, that I thought Snapwidget was Instagram. There were emails up and down when I "couldn't remember" my username and password and Joe from Snapwidget was so amazing. He even offered me the Pro-Widget for free, because South Africa is very close to their heart, because one of their team members lives in South Africa and I am a South African. I graciously refused their kind offer of a free Pro-Widget, because it just would not feel right.

Advert Free Snapwidget
I have since signed up for the Pro-Widget and it is amazing. It has no adverts, you can have up to ten different widgets. You can filter by Username and Hashtag. You can have only your timeline or your feed or your likes or everything. You can make different size thumbnails, different types of widgets and it is just so cool. I just have to figure out how to make the Widget open in a new window, when you click on the widget. I like all my links on my blog to open in a new window. I am not a fan of the back button to go back to where I was. I know I can just email support and they will help me, but I kinda feel like that annoying kid in the class that asks too many questions and stupid questions, just to get the teacher's attention. If I don't figure it out I will email support.

Widget In My Blog
The widget is only $6.99 a month, which I know is costly for South Africans, but if you are in the US, try it and I am sure you will like it enough to pay the $6.99 a month for the Pro-Widget. I am using the Pro-Widget, because after graciously turning Joe's offer down for a 100% discount, he offered a 50% discount, just so that I can try the Pro-Widget. It is really the best Widget to use for your Instagram photos on your blog, plus the support is amazing. This is totally my opinion and although I have been given a 50% discount it has in no way influenced how I feel about the widget. I loved it when I was using the basic free version, but was then just bowled over by the support and service given for a product/service that I was not even paying for. This post is long overdue and it was meant to be posted long before the discount was given and even long before this post where I said I would do a post on Snapwidget. It is really a great widget to show case your Instagram photos on your blog, so if you don't already have it, click here to get started. You can follow my Instagram Journey by clicking here.

Follow on Bloglovin

Thursday, 22 May 2014

Plant Seeds Of Kindness And Other Stuff

I am hectically busy today, thanks to our Accounting firm who lost or misplaced or threw away my schedules that I gave them in December and I have to now reprint them and I have other tax deadlines and all my other everyday stuff. I really should not be on my blog and I really should not be complaining about all the work I have to do, I should be doing it. So here is some Thought for Thursday.

Image Source

Image Source

Image Source

Image Source

Image Source
Have an awesome Thursday

Follow on Bloglovin

Electric Hot Water Bottles...... What Next

Winter hit very quickly and normally I am quite prepared, but this year it came too fast. I can't get my head around the fact that it is almost the end of May and Winter. I honestly have not felt the cold at all this year. Nothing like other years when I was freezing cold all the time. Mark has been complaining about the cold since the weekend, but to be honest I am not that cold. I am wondering if it is because I gave up smoking, I read somewhere on my smoke free journey that smoking or quitting smoking affects your body temperature. Don't quote me, because it is a vague recollection that I read it and last Winter it was freezing - I was freezing so I am not sure why this year I have hardly felt the cold. The days have been dull and grey and cold looking with spurts of winter sunshine and blue sky - like winter and cold temperature days. It could be menopause too, I don't know all I do know is that thankfully I am not as cold as I usually am (yet).

Rechargeable Hot Water Bottle
With the sudden drop in temperature and not being prepared I haven't put our electric blankets on our beds yet. Our electric blankets are over 10 years old and it worried me that they are old and maybe faulty and something might happen and cause a fire whilst we are sleeping. I have a fear of fire especially in winter, but that is a post for another time. The last seven years have been a whirlwind blur of grief and the years have flown by and now all of a sudden everything is old and needs replacing, like my dishwasher, my microwave is breaking, the electric blankets, the house needs serious maintenance and it is all of a sudden. It is not that I have stopped grieving, it is just as if the universe has forced me to take a look around me and see that stuff needs to be done.

Electric Hot Water Bottle With Cover
I searched online for prices on electric blankets and Pick 'n Pay were the cheapest and whilst searching for the electric blankets, I saw these electric hot water bottles. I thought about buying the dog's hot water bottles last year, because I don't allow them to sleep on our beds anymore. It just worries me that they might burst and burn them, because dogs and especially Spike and Jingles dig and scratch their blankets into a crumpled mess. I showed the electric hot water bottles to Mark and he said that he should buy them for his grandparents. His grandfather is very old and incontinent, so an electric blanket is a no no. When I went to buy our electric blankets, I bought two electric hot water bottles, so he can give them to his grandparents and I can try them out. They cost R70.00 and are really so impressive. It takes 15 minutes to heat up and it gets so hot. I sat with it on my lap or behind my back for about two hours and then left it on the desk at work and at about 4pm it was still warm. I charged it at 11am. I am seriously thinking about getting us each one to use whilst watching TV. A normal hot water bottle is about R50.00 (I think). Clint loved his hot water bottle in winter and never used his electric blanket. He would have loved these. For older people, like Mark's grandparents, closing normal hot water bottles is also difficult and with these, you don't have to worry about tightening the cap or burning with boiling water. I forgot to add - the only downside is they only last a year and considering our Winters are so short, you can say they are used for three months only.
Oh and look what else I found today - chocoholics dream - Bubbly Top Deck and decadent is not the word - yum-malicious.

Bubbly Top Deck
Who needs a hot water bottle or electric blanket when you have a Bull Dog Blanket. I woke up this morning and spotted this....

Pluto & Miss Piggy
It does not bother Pluto at all that she sits on him and she is heavy. Winter warmth or not, she loves lying on Pluto or as close to him as possible. Lastly some cat warmth. Garfield claimed the basket that belongs to my mother.My mother gave me a whole lot of stuff in December and some of it was in a basket, which Garfield claimed. Garfield for those who don't know is female. She was supposed to be male until a ginger Tom cat started hanging around when she was less than 6 months old and we discovered that she was female and pregnant. Well she claimed the basket and when I first put a blanket in it for her she refused to get back into it until I took the blanket out. As the temperatures started dropping I put a blanket in the basket again and now she barely leaves the basket. She is in there day and night.

She is A Real Queen

And now for a warm bath and a warm bed

Follow on Bloglovin

Tuesday, 20 May 2014

Shopping... And Why I Hate It.....

I am not a shopper by any means. I absolutely detest going shopping and only go out of necessity. When people say "having a bad day?  how about retail therapy to cure a bad day" I think seriously, how can shopping make you feel better. When I am having a bad day, going shopping would be like waving a red flag in a bull's face. Either way shopping is bad news for me. If I am in the mood for shopping I just waste money on stuff I did not need or want. If I am not in the mood for shopping and am forced to go to the shops, the universe screams out at me to stay home, because everything will go wrong. Mark is the one who does most of the shopping in our house or hears a huge groan when he says are we going shopping for groceries

Image Source

After my post about neglecting my animals, I showered and whilst getting ready to go to the shops, I was playing the "should I shouldn't I" game, but felt so bad, because I am always saying that I am going to bake Miss Piggy biscuits and I never do. She loves Bobtail Peanut Butter Biscuits, but LOVES homemade ones even more. We had already decided that it was too cold to bath them, more Mark's decision, because he knew he would have to help me bath them. Not baking for them would have just been laziness on my part, so off I went to Woolworths with a ten item shopping list.

Peanut Butter Dog Biscuits
Our local Woolworths Store was revamped last year or the year before, as time flies it might have even been in 2012. Since the store was extended and revamped the shelves are always empty or they have stock that is about to expire and yesterday was no different. There are always blogs or Twitter hash-tags bashing Woolworths for their high prices or employment equity policies. I never get on those bandwagons. Their fruit and veggies are the best as well as their chicken and mince, so I don't complain about price, but I will complain about bad service, expired stock and no stock and our closest Woolworths is guilty of it all the time. Yesterday their shelves were generally empty, they had no wholewheat flour and no Pasta Shells. It was not a major issue, and I thought I would go to Spar to get the other stuff I needed. As I was standing in the long queue I looked around and noticed just how empty their shelves are and that they have not had small packets of cashew nuts for ages.

Peach Cobbler
Well both Spars in our area had no wholewheat flour either. Is wholewheat flour a scare commodity or do store managers just not care that their shelves are empty? Going to three stores for a ten item grocery list and then to still come home short of two items is frustrating to say the least. What about the merchandisers and reps, do they not go to stores and check that their products are not on the shelves in well known stores or do they just not care, because their competitors are just as slack. As far as I know there is Sasko; Golden Cloud and Snowflake, but three stores did not have wholewheat flour. So maybe you no longer get wholewheat flour. In the end I made Peanut Butter Biscuits with White Cake Wheat Flour. It is not the best for dogs and also the biscuits came out too soft for dog biscuits, but Miss Piggy loves them. She goes crazy with the smell of peanut butter and the sound of the Kenwood mixer. I also made a Peach Cobbler for dessert with our Pasta Bolognese. The Peach Cobbler burnt a tiny bit on the edge, but was so delicious with Ultramel Custard.

Peach Cobbler & Ultramel Custard
I have to say the Woolworths Twitter Account  is very customer service orientated and responded to my frustrated tweet today and promised to investigate ... AGAIN. They are one of the few stores that do look into complaints and always try and remedy the situation. This store just can't seem to get it right and it is the closest and most convenient for me.

All in all I had a very frustrating day yesterday. Out dishwasher packed up yesterday, after I started baking; our vacuum cleaner packed up last week on Thursday and I have totally messed up my blog lay out and widgets and cannot get it back to what it was. So I am just as frustrated and angry with myself

Follow on Bloglovin
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...