Wednesday, 17 December 2014

A Change Of Plans

On Saturday I went shopping, I try not to ever shop on the weekends, especially Saturday and Sunday mornings, so it was very foolish going this past weekend. As I was pushed and shoved walked around, it felt as though I was transported forward in time. I keep saying this year went by so fast and it has, it has gone faster than any other year. I had the weirdest feeling, like I can only imagine someone would feel when they have been lying in a coma for months and then wake up and months have gone by. I am not making light of someone in that kind of Medical situation, I honestly feel like that. It does not feel like it is the end of the year and I don't know how I arrived here. Even the year that Clint died and the first few years afterwards, I was VERY aware of Christmas and the year end and New Year - now it is like weird and the only way I can explain it, is that I fell asleep and slept for 8 or 9 months and woke up at the end of the year.

I hardly see Chad and although he is now a month older than what Clint was when he died, we are in that time of Clint's lasts. Where Clint finished grade 11, our last December; our last holiday and it is terrifying for me, because we are going into new territory. I also feel like I went to sleep and woke up and Chad was 17.  Clint took the "right" time to turn 17, Chad's was in a flash. I feel like Chad also won't get to live older than 17 - it is awful and having him ride motorbikes is like Deja vu.

With all this going on in my head and how fast time is flying, today 3 weeks ago, Chad wrote his last exam and has been on school holidays since. He is now in his fourth week of school holidays and last weekend, I decided that there is no way we can go through another December like last year. Last year we were going to buy a farm/small holding. Mark gets these ideas in his head and rushes headfirst into them. He looked at the farm, put in an offer to purchase, took me to see it and we spent our December working - me getting our financials up to date and him working, because he needed money. It was awful - not the first December that we worked, but two in a row was not going to cut it. The farm fell through, so what a waste. In hindsight it was a good thing, because we have too much on our plates and although the idea of having horses and sheep and ducks and chickens running around is really awesome, the reality not so. For the first 2 or 3 years it would have been a weekend and holiday place only and we would never have managed going there every weekend and honestly a farming community just outside Thabazimbi, although beautiful, is not on my list of places to stay.

Chad with his "new" bike

Well I decided that it would be a good idea to go away and before I suggested it to Mark, I spent the whole of the Saturday and Sunday looking for holiday accommodation. EVERYWHERE was full. Last week Monday I received a confirmation from one place on the West Coast. I then suggested it to Mark, telling him that it would probably be the last holiday that we have with Chad as a kid and then I told Chad. Shame he was so sweet he said to me " Don't worry mom, it won't be the last holiday you have with me, there will be plenty more, I am not moving away when I finish school". Anyway, we decided that we are now going on holiday, but Mark said we must try and find a place closer and Chad said we must see if we can't find a place on the Wild Coast near Transkei so that him and Mark can ride down there - also much closer to home, but everywhere was full. I received another confirmation from another place on the West Coast, but we decided although a lot cheaper and far more to do there, it was too commercialised. So we are now going away, but only for 6 days, because the place we are going to could only accommodate for those days. The second place had place for the 10 days, but rather quality than quantity as they say.  They are still going to take their bikes with to ride off road down there. Chad had to get another bike so that he has an on/off road bike - hence the pictures of him and bikes. We had to then find a house/pet sitter and that is all in place, now we just have to get through this week and off we go.

I have been feeling so awful over the past few weeks. My legs have been swelling up and my whole body, even my face has been swollen and bloated. I was not looking forward to a 16 hour car drive with legs and feet already swollen, so I have been juicing since Friday morning to detox and have only been having spinach and cucumber smoothies with apple, peach, mango, watermelon or papaya with ice and water since Friday morning and an avocado for lunch and stirfry vegetables every second night for supper. I feel so much better and was probably so overloaded on sugar and gluten. I was waking up everyday, bloated and swollen feeling like I had one major hangover and I have not touched alcohol in months and have not had a hangover in many years. My legs have not been swollen at all since Sunday, not even in the late afternoons when it has been very hot. I changed the smoothie from this one and added ice and swapped carrots for cucumber and left out ginger. I have to make a concerted effort to stop eating so much sugar and gluten as it really does not agree with me. When you are young you can eat anything and everything and as you get older, you start developing food intolerance's that you have never had before.  I need to do the Virgin Diet properly and will when we get back, but I am going to try and cut out sugar and gluten whilst we are away as well.

Are you going on holiday or are you one of the lucky ones that migrated to the coast weeks ago. No matter what you are doing or where you are going, travel safely and arrive alive at your holiday destination.

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